Pennsylvania Lieutenant Governor John Fetterman has come up for a novel way to combat the racism he says is inherent in the American voting system. With Republicans aleady trying to prevent black people by voting by assigning them the near impossible task of obtaining an ID, Fetterman, has offered to relieve black people of the necessity of figuring out how to vote and who to vote for entirely
“If you think that black people are competent human beings capable of owning an ID and deciding who to vote for, then you’re a vile racist” announced Fetterman, “Should any black person miraculously obtain an ID and somehow find their way to the polls on Election Day, I will happily remove the burden of needing to figure out how to vote and who to vote by casting your vote for you!”
As part of his program Fetterman will hover around the DMV on election day to aid any black people who wandered in and survived the ordeal of having a license printed. Any survivors will be offered the choice of having Fetterman lead them to the polls and cast their ballot for them. Fetterman believes that this program will be so strongly supported in black communities, that he could see as high as 100% black support for him in the upcoming election.